Breaking Up is Hard To Do

Breaking the bankIn preparation for becoming a Mrs., I picked up a fantastic book called “Smart Couples Finish Rich.” What prompted this purchase was a startling statistic I heard the other day. It’s been found that the top issue leading to marital dissatisfaction and divorce is money; or rather, a lack of communication about money. To guard against this, I purchased the book and have been forced to take a long hard look at my finances. When the sticker shock wore off, I pulled out my recent statements and did some analysis. I knew it would hurt, but not this much.Poring over my credit card bills, I came to the sad realization that if I ever want to be fiscally responsible, I was going to have to cut ties with some of my best friends. Friends who have been with me through thick and thin, who have partied it up during the best of times and made me feel better when I was blue. I wish it didn’t have to be this way, but unfortunately I just don’t see another way to save for a downpayment. So here it goes – Marc, Jimmy, Dolce and Gabbana: It’s not you, it’s me. You’ve been nothing but good to me; I just don’t have room for you in my life right now – or rather, I don’t have room for you in my credit card statement. There, I said it.

All of a sudden a movie montage begins in my head, with scenes playing out to the soundtrack of Madonna’s “Say Goodbye”: I’m celebrating my first paycheck and college graduation in the purse room of Saks, eagerly writing a check for my black Marc Jacobs leather slouch bag. Scene two takes place in Nordstroms: I’m brimming with excitement as I pull up the delicate zipper on my first pair of Jimmy Choo boots. Next we’re in London, at Harrods where I found the perfect pair of Kurt Geiger cowboy boots (in my defense, that was back when they were cool again). The scenes go on until the phone rings and my mind comes reeling back to the present, where I’m sitting broke and dejected on the living room floor. I let it ring so I can finish saying my goodbyes. Besides, according to my new financial plan, I can’t afford call back until the off-peak hours.

This article originally appeared on Shoetube.tv, the destination site for shoe-aholics.

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